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Starting Early: Internet Safety, Body Safety & Puberty Resources for Younger Children
- Amy Begnal, Ed.S., LMHC, NCC
- 1 day ago
- 5 min read
Parents often wonder when they should begin talking to children about internet safety, body safety, and puberty.
Our answer is simple: You don't need to tell young children everything. But you don't have to wait until they're older to start.
The conversations we have when children are 5, 6, 7, or 8 create the foundation for the much more complicated conversations we'll need to have when they're 11, 13, or 16.
For younger children, the goal isn't to teach them about every danger that exists online. It's to teach a few foundational ideas:
My body belongs to me.
I can say when something makes me uncomfortable.
People online aren't always who they say they are.
Some information should stay private.
If something strange, scary, confusing, or inappropriate happens, I should get a grown-up.
I won't be in trouble for asking for help.
What Should Younger Children Know?
What children need to understand changes significantly between kindergarten and upper elementary school.
AGE | WHAT TO TEACH |
4-6 | Correct names for body parts; body autonomy; private body parts; appropriate boundaries; asking permission before touching others; identifying trusted adults; and simple rules about devices and personal information. |
6-7 | Continue body-safety conversations. Teach that full name, address, school, passwords, photos, and location are private information. Teach children to get an adult if something scary, confusing, or "for grown-ups" appears online. |
7-8 | Talk about gaming, chats, videos, and advertising. Explain that people online may pretend to be someone else. Introduce scams, mean behavior, cyberbullying, and the fact that pictures and videos aren't always real. Begin simple conversations about upcoming body changes. |
8-9 | Begin more intentional puberty education. Talk about privacy, online friendships, messaging, inappropriate content, and what to do if someone asks them to keep an online interaction secret. |
9-10 | Expand puberty education. Discuss group chats, peer pressure, personal photos, inappropriate content, online strangers, AI-created content, and why children should involve a trusted adult whenever something feels wrong. |
Children don't need one giant "safety talk." Short conversations that happen naturally and repeatedly are usually much more useful.
Our Favorite Resources for Younger Children
RESOURCE | BEST FOR |
NCMEC NetSmartz / Into the Cloud | Our top child-facing resource. Developmentally appropriate videos and activities about online safety, inappropriate interactions, cyberbullying, reporting, and asking adults for help. |
Thorn for Parents | Our top parent resource. Age-specific guidance beginning with ages 4-6 and continuing through ages 7-9 and 10-12. Helps parents build open communication about technology and online sexual safety. |
Be Internet Awesome / Interland | Our favorite interactive resource. A game-based approach to privacy, phishing, scams, oversharing, kindness, and online decision-making. |
Our favorite parent puberty resource. American Academy of Pediatrics information about children's bodies, development, puberty, and talking with children about sexuality. | |
Common Sense Digital Citizenship | Excellent general digital resource. Grade-based lessons covering privacy, media literacy, cyberbullying, online behavior, and responsible technology use. |
NCMEC NetSmartz & Into the Cloud
NCMEC's Into the Cloud isn't only for preteens. The program is designed for children 10 and under, and earlier seasons include resources appropriate for younger elementary-age children.
Topics include cyberbullying, recognizing inappropriate interactions or content, online exploitation, reporting, and asking for help. Episodes are short, which makes them particularly useful for younger attention spans.
Thorn for Parents: Starting the Conversation Early
One reason we recommend Thorn is that its guidance doesn't begin at adolescence. Thorn provides parent conversation guidance for children as young as 4-6, followed by specific resources for ages 7-9 and 10-12.
For younger children, parents don't need to introduce the most frightening possibilities of online exploitation. Instead, Thorn helps adults begin building the communication habits that become protective as children gain more independence.
The goal is for children to learn early: If something happens online that feels weird, uncomfortable, or confusing, tell me.
Be Internet Awesome & Interland
Be Internet Awesome is especially appealing for elementary-age children because it turns abstract internet-safety concepts into something children can practice.
Its free interactive game, Interland, teaches children about hackers, phishing, oversharing, cyberbullying, and responsible digital citizenship through gameplay. The accompanying Family Guide gives parents activities and conversation starters to continue the lessons offline.
HealthyChildren.org: Puberty Information for Parents
Parents don't need to wait until obvious signs of puberty appear before explaining what's coming.
HealthyChildren.org, from the American Academy of Pediatrics, provides parent-friendly information about physical development, puberty, menstruation, erections, masturbation, body image, and talking with children about sex.
This can be particularly helpful for parents who aren't sure how much information is appropriate yet. Normal puberty has a wide range, so conversations should follow the individual child rather than simply waiting for a particular birthday.
Common Sense Digital Citizenship
Common Sense offers grade-based digital citizenship education covering privacy, media literacy, cyberbullying, online behavior, and responsible technology use.
For younger children, these lessons can complement more safety-focused programs by helping them gradually learn how to be a responsible person online, not simply what they're supposed to avoid.
One Internet Rule We Love for Younger Children
Long lists of rules can be difficult for young children to remember. Consider establishing one simple response:
Stop. Come get me.
Something scary pops up? Stop. Come get me.
Someone says something weird in a game? Stop. Come get me.
Someone asks for a picture? Stop. Come get me.
A video appears that they know they're not supposed to watch? Stop. Come get me.
They clicked something they weren't supposed to? Come get me anyway.
That final part matters. A safety plan isn't very effective if a child believes using it will immediately result in punishment.
Body Safety Is Part of Internet Safety
For young children, online safety shouldn't be completely separated from the body-safety conversations families are already having.
Children can learn that their bodies belong to them, private parts are private, they can say no to unwanted touch, adults shouldn't ask children to keep uncomfortable secrets, and they can always tell a trusted adult when something feels wrong.
As children begin using connected devices, those same principles simply extend into digital spaces. Someone asking for a picture of a private part isn't suddenly a completely different safety lesson.
Your body belongs to you. You can say no. And you can always tell us.
You Don't Need to Have One Perfect Conversation
Many parents put off these conversations because they aren't quite sure what to say. Fortunately, children don't need one perfectly worded talk. They need hundreds of small ones.
Talk while you're driving.
Ask about the game they're playing.
Wonder aloud whether a video looks real.
Point out an advertisement that's trying to manipulate you.
Ask what kids at school are watching.
Talk about why an app wants your location.
Answer body questions when they come up.
And when your child tells you something uncomfortable, try to make your first response one that encourages them to tell you again.
The goal isn't to raise a child who never encounters anything inappropriate, makes a mistake online, or takes a risk. It's to raise a child who increasingly knows how to recognize a problem, how to respond to it, and who to ask for help. Those skills start long before middle school.
This information is provided for educational purposes. Parents and caregivers are encouraged to preview resources and determine which materials are appropriate for their child's developmental level, needs, and family values.
Amy Begnal, Ed.S., LMHC, NCC, is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Washington and Clinical Director at Anacortes Psych & Wellness.
Amy is passionate about helping individuals, couples, and families create deeper connection, build resilience, and experience greater fulfillment in their relationships - with both themselves and others. She provides a warm, collaborative, and nonjudgmental space where clients feel supported as they navigate challenges and move toward meaningful, lasting change.
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